(drafted and backed in the spring 2018)
~ part one ~
Three
men scrawl notes with seriousness around a table, one with maps,
annotating. They look up at the sound of thunder to the window showing a
clear night.
A knock at the door.
They cover their notes suspiciously as the one with the maps flips them
over and stares across to the others ... "No. Peeking."
He opens the door.
Lieu Hanh - Carrying a RPG launcher on her back from the Sabine battle, "Hi ! Brandon says you've got a game tonight !"
Xquic - Also with RPG, "You do have a game tonight ... ?"
They both hold up small velvet bags with smiles.
Mapkeeper - "Brandon ... ?"
Lieu Hanh - "Brandon. Yes. I'm sure you've heard of him."
Xquic - "Fuck Brandon."
Lieu
Hanh - "I can't believe you're still mad just because he bird-lofted
your stupid character forever ago. Get over it. Brandon's the shit."
Xquic - Looking away, "Whatever."
Lieu Hanh - "Anyway. Do ... you have a game tonight ... ?"
They both smile as wide as physically possible while each holds an unraveling bag of weed in their other hands.
________
Morgan stabs an orc through with her gun-blade then shoots, clearly enjoying herself, while Andromeda sits bored on a rock.
Morgan - Through a police comm (from 'Three Days'), "Amelia. Back yet ?"
Amelia's voice - "Back. Dropped off and loaded"
Morgan - "Any clue on these maps ?"
Amelia - In the engine room cleaning Morgan's pipe angrily. Surrounded
by open books, she glances up at them then back, "Nothing. Probably
hand drawn."
____
Andromeda - "I can't believe you call this a date night."
________
The
two others in the basement look up from their notes, staring as Lieu
Hahn and Xquic walk in after the mapkeeper runs around for chairs
"They're in !"
They slam their RPGs on the table then very gently open their velvet bags to remove the dice.
Lieu Hanh - "Hey do you guys know Brandon ?"
Xquic stares at her, ignored.
Daniel - "Are ... you from the cosplay convention ?"
They look each other over ... "Sure !"
The mapkeeper runs around gathering bowls and snacks, "No peeking !" Running the other way, "Brandon's the shit !"
Xquic - "Whatever."
____
Andromeda - "I'm not leaving this rock."
________
Xquic - Wearing Andromeda's wig, "My name's Andromeda, and I'm a sexy queen from Mycenae."
They all stare ...
Lieu Hanh - "That's so fucking creepy."
Xquic - "yeah ... creepy style ..."
____
Morgan - "Fine. Have fun on remote control."
Andromeda - "What ?!"
____
Lieu Hanh - "I'm Morganna. A delicate fairy princess."
Xquic stares at her.
____
Morgan spits, Andromeda turns away.
____
Xquic - "She will kill you."
________
Lieu Hanh - Rolling a blunt, "Last Blunt. Weed's gone."
Xquic - Drawing a picture, "Fuck that. I'm not even done with my character."
Lieu Hanh - "Seriously. There should be a bag that never runs dry." She licks the roll and looks at the mapkeeper.
He
stares for a second, then his eyes go wide before he scratches out the
name atop the map (Xotym's Scarf) and replaces it with :
a holiday special about nothing at all
Andromeda - Standing up involuntarily, "Fuck !" She's suddenly draped
in pretty pink princess armor, staring down at herself in horror.
Vincent as :
(A player appears from a flash from the sky, absurdly armored)
~ The Invincinator ~
Daniel as :
(Another appears in a flash, looking saintly)
~ The Pala-Dan-Can ~
Special guest stars :
Xquic as
~ Evil Queen Andromeda ~
Andromeda - "Hey !"
Lieu Hanh as
Andromeda - Giggling at Morgan, "Wow. I think maybe I can do this now."
Morgan - Wearing a fairy gown with wings, "What ?" Looking down ... "I'm going to kill her."
They chase random monsters down the hall past dancing skeletons through the song, Morgan struggling with her skirt while Lieu Hahn and Xquic high five while the other players dance in their chairs.
Larger monsters chase them back past the skeletons, Morgan trying to tear the skirt.
Lieu Hanh smiles over her page which says '+ 2 fairy dress'.
The mapkeeper stare over the books hitting the last of the blunt, burning his fingers and mouth, "Damn it !"
Dealer Mike as
Mike - On the phone, "Okay but you gotta let me be the evil wizard this time."
Mapkeeper - A sigh. "Fine."
An evil wizard cackles far down the caverns lightning erupting from his fingers with skeleton warriors rising all around.
________
Blunts are rolled then dice as the camera passes around the table while the skeletons dance to the chorus (Yes. Take it.)
_____________________________________
Kurukulla - "Shopping, shopping, shopping ..."
Gearworkers - "Shopping shopping shopping ..."
____
In the arms shoppe ~
Kurukulla -Slamming the door open, hood falling down and cloak open with her outstretched arms, "! Venus ! I need the ! Boom !"
The audience cheers, she looks around waving, "Yeah ! It's Me !"
Venus clears her throat and carries two portable quad launchers to the counter one by one. "Payment ?"
Kurukulla - Eyeing the beautiful launchers ... "Gold ?"
Venus - "All up on conductors ... I'm actually looking for artifacts these days ..." She eyes Kurukulla's bag.
Kurukulla - Drops her sack and digs before throwing three pieces of wood onto the counter. "Pieces of the cross."
Venus looks suspiciously, then puts up her eyepiece to examine, "Wrong wood."
Kurukulla - "Huh ... well that's a wandering trader to kill tonight ..."
Venus - "Indeed."
Gearworkers nod their approval, punching palms.
Kurukulla - Back in the bag then digging, "Still good for burning ... Oh ! Eye of the oracle ?" She puts an eyeball on the counter, rolling and righting itself to look at Venus.
Venus - "I already have the true eye of the oracle ..." She puts up her glass, showing the eye staring first at Kurukulla, then angrily at the fake.
It rolls away sad and hops back into the sack.
Kurukulla - "I wonder who's eye that was ... hang on." Digging deeper, while the workers peer into the bag, and she eyes the launchers with want. "Do they have feed chains ...?"
Venus - Staring, "... two quad launchers means eight feed chains and the full load ..."
Kurukulla - "And the load pack !"
Venus - "You do understand how heavy this will be."
Kurukulla - Grinning, "Yeah ..."
____
Kurukulla - "Walking out of the shop launching rockets into the air, carrying the full load, "Shop ping, Shop ping, Shop ping ..."
Gearworkers - Following with large sacks of rockets, "Shopping !"
________________
With a twitching eye Amelia cleans Morgan's pipe, then a sound. Then the grinding clang of a metal door opening, the twisting squeak of the airlock spin. Then silence. Getting up angrily she grabs the flamethrower,.
Through the door from the engine room, a light in her eyes, "Freeze ! Put the ... that down, and put you hands where I can see them !"
